पंजाबी जोक्स एसएमएस and Status Messages

Ae Dil kisi di yaad che Rona hai Fizul,

Ae Dil kisi di yaad che Rona hai Fizul,

Ae ansoon bade ne Anmol inna nu khona hai Fizul.

Royin unna layi jo tere te Fida hon,

Unna layi ki Rona jinaa de Ashique hazaar hon.

Mainu Yaar-yaar Karde Rahe,,,,,

Es Yaar Ne Sanu Rula Dita,......

Hora Ton Ki Umida Si,jad Yaar Ne Hi Bhula Dita,,,,

Mudke Dosti Nahi Karni Main,menu Yaar Ne Sayana Bana Dita.

1budi mar gyi
ladies rone lagi-bebe tu kithe gyi
jithe na dhup na cha
na roti na sbzi
na bijli na pani
Snta bnte nu-yar dekhi budi kite Sade ghr ta ni chli gyi

Santa ne punjabi kudi ka rishta apne
liye manga. Ladki ke baap ne usko khoob
maara. Maar khaa ke santa kapde
jhaadta hua bola, ?TO PHIR MAIN INKAAR
SAMJHOON

Wife:tuade ghar nal0 ta mere meke wadia h
Tuade ghar ta bartan v m leke ai c
Husbnd:ta hi hr bartan te likheya hoya h"GURUDWARA SINGH SABHA"

Santa 2 a girl: Aao Sohneo Saade dil de ander lang aao.
Girl: Jutti Utaran?
Santa: Na ji aive hi lang aao, appan kehda Akand Path rakhya.?

Oh Menu KeHndi Teri ZinDagI Nu Mai JannatBna Dau.
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Bnauni Kamli nu aje chaa V Ni AunDi.
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ConfiDeNce Ta DekHo. ajj kall dia kudian da..

Santa: Dr.saab tusi ta kende c

svere game khedn nal sehat thik rehndi hai

per mainu ta koi farq ni paya?

Dctr: Tusi keri game khedi c?

Snta: Mobile te sap wali

1 wari loki sante da muh kala kr k pind wich gali-2 ghuma rhe c
usdi wife khadi ro rahi c
Snta: kamli q roi jani an
ghar ja k cha bna,
do tan galliyan reh gayia

Calr: Jnab mere ghr Agg lagi a, jaldi aao
Fireman-tusi pani pa k buja k dkho
Calr-Dekhia c pani pake v naibuji
Frmn-fer saleyo asi kehra fuka mar k bujani aa

Father : ki hoya put, kyu royi jana, mainu das main v tere dosta varga ha

Son : ki dasa yarr, apni vali nu milan geya c, tere vali ne dekh leya, bahut kuteya yarr

Santa: Preeto,

why do u luv a rose tht dies in a day,

but

don't luv me who dies for u everyday

Preeto:Haye ve Santeya!

Haye main marja!!

Kutteya,enni angreji=D

AALU Bhindi nu pyar krda c.
Ohne prpoze kita ta bhindi akad ich kendi tu tan MOTA ae,
mainu ni psand
Hun vkho aalu diyan girlfrnds
Aalu-Gobi
Aalu-gajar
Aalu-falian
Aalu-Shimlamirch
Aalu-matar
Aalu-methi
Aalu-paneer
Par bhindi di koi saheli ya dost ni.
Moral:-
jo akad kar janda,
oh kalla rah janda.

A child came back from school & said his father-Papa mainu aj school ch kutt pai.
Bap-O kyo?
Beta-Master ne pucheya 3*2=Main keha 6.
Bap-Theek ta hai.
Beta-Fer usne pucheya 2*3=?
Bap-HARAMDEA oh v 6 hi hunde ne.
Beta-Bus bappu Main v ta ehi line kahi c,saale ne rail bnati..

Teacher- Tum kal kyo nahi aye? Santa- Madam, ghar mein 1 jaruri kam tha. Teacher- o i c. Santa- Nai madam,sirf program hi bnya c. Oh i ni.................

Log

Mitran di pur zor farmysh te ek waari fer

Na zuban se

Na fone se

DIRECT

DIL SE

Nara awam da

Zardari bekaar da

Te jerra is msg nu roke o v odhe naal

da.

Boy sees his x GF after 1 yr in market
Girl smiles...
Boy:Sadi jaan te bani hai tera hasa ho gya...
Girl:Tu hale kalla hi ghumda firda ae,sada kaka vi ho gya...

Bullet vala activa vali nu:kade bullet chalaya?
Activa vali tez karke age chali gai Bullet vala fer brabar lya k puchda 'kade bullet chalaya?'
Age ja k bullet vale da accident ho gya Activa vali aa ke kehndi aaya maza?
Munda-"kanjariye tahin tan puchda c ki je chalaya tan dasde breakan kithe ne"

BANTA: TENU Aini kut KYO PYI..?
SANTA: KAL BRAAT ch BOLI GALT PEGI C..?
BANTA: KIDDAN...?
SANTA: "BAARI BRSI KHATAN GAYA C KHAT KE LEANDI TAAR , BHNGRA TA SAJDA- JE NACHE KURI DA YAAR.??
Banta: Fir ta kut paini hi c.
Santa: Mainu ta sirf kut hi payi jehra nachiya c audda parso bhog hai;)

Banta to Santa-yar tu eh mobile new lia hai.
Snta-nhi apni girlfrd da chkya hai.
Bnta-kyu
Snta-yar oh jdo mildi si ehi kehndi si tu mera phone kyu nhi chkda.

Chuhi chuhe se-Tu mere lyi jaan de sakda a?
Chuha-kade nhi?
chuhi-kyon?
chuha-:Ssadi maa nu put nhi labne tenu yaar bathere......

Sharma & hiswife went forDivorce.
Judge:U have 3 kids.How wil u divide them?
Sharma thinks & says, chado ji fir agle sal 4 jawaka nal awa ge fir 2-2 kar lwa ge..

Ik kudi collage nu ja rahic,Os nu parpoz karn lai ik munde ne kiha,"Chann ta Raat nu charda hai,Ajj dine kive?
KUDI: "ULLU ta RAAT nu bolde ne,Ajj dine kive?

Ajkal dia Kudiyaan da dialog --
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"Bebe koi munda manda fasona ta
gal kar"
"Roti pakoni koi saukha kam
aa"

1 Jat nu kavi samelan ch zabardasti stage te bhej dita janda hai.
O sher araz karda hai
"E Chand sitaro,
Bhen de yaaro,
mainu kuj ni aanda,
mainu thalle utaro"

PAMMA ---? Waiter , 1 Chicken lai ke aa jaldi
Waiter ---> SIR ! French chicken orSpanish chicken ?
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PAMMA ---? Jehra marji lai aa yaar, mai kehra ohde nal gallan karniya ne

Pendu Gf-MCDONLD chaliye?
Bf-Spelling bol fer jawange
Gf-fer KFC chalde ha,
bf-KFC da Fullform bol
Gf-Rehan de kutteya,
tu kulcha hi khwa de.

Wife - Main chali aan pekey aaj ton baad kade vapis ni aona
Santa - Dafa ho ja gandi janaani
wife - Bas aahi tereyan mithiyan gallan mainu jaan ni dindiya...

1din santa kele de chilke to tilk k dig pya.Uth k kapde jhad k tur pya.
Age fer kele da chilka pya si,
ta mathe te hath mar k kenda
"oho! hun fer digna pau".

Boy: Apna adress daso tuhade ghr auna ae.
Grl:jithe crow bolda howe aa jawi
Boy:crow te kise ghr v bol skda h
Grl:tu v ta chhitter hi khane ne, kito v kha lai.